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hi! first off, i love your arcane meta, especially the jayce characterization and hextech details. you get it.
now second, (and feel free to ignore this wall of text for any reason):
if you're in the mood to talk about meta, i'm curious to hear your take on one season 2 thing that i've been scratching my head about
how much does post-anomaly jayce know about the future? my initial impression was that wizard viktor only told jayce what we see onscreen, and jayce was kind of improvising and trying his best without detailed knowledge of future events.
but some lines ("we're meant to lose this fight") and a comment from the artbook (post-anomaly jayce wearing armor bc he knows there is a battle coming) imply that he knows more than he lets on.
what's your (watsonian) take of jayce's knowledge of the future in season 2? is there any detail in the show that sheds some light on this?
i think jayce knowing or not knowing about certain events really recontextualises some scenes. is he following his own or wizard viktors plans? is he suprised about the events of act 3? i've been rotating this in my head but i'm not sure what interpretation i prefer.
Thank you so much!
As for your question, it's a really interesting one!
Unfortunately, I do think I need to start the answer with the Doylist one:
Jayce knows as much about the future as he needs to for the plot.
I think this is important to note because it informs an understanding of their choice not to show us him getting an exposition download of everything Wizard Viktor has worked out over the years as to how exactly Jayce can thread this needle of saving Viktor at exactly the right time.
Because, in theory, the amount of optimization could be infinite. It could get all the way down to, "Jayce needs to be scared into falling into this exact pit and spending no more than 3 months there because that gives him the suffering needed for his plea to Viktor to be heartfelt and informed by similar suffering, but not so long that Jayce goes insane from isolation."
Or even things like, "Ekko needs to go to the Happy Zaun universe or else he won't have the sympathy needed for him to prevent Jinx's suicide and without her present at the battle, one of Herald Viktor's mind-control arms snatches up Ekko too soon rather than grabbing Jinx instead, so he's not there to buy Jayce's those critical extra seconds for his appeal to True Love and also put a bomb in Herald Viktor's face."
That said....
I admit, part of me still sort of wishes that Jayce had been the one to go through multiple realities of optimizing, just because I think it answers... a few more questions? Like how did he suddenly get so comfortable with killing someone like Salo, if he wasn't fighting in other universes? Why does he look so aged if only 3-6 months passed? How does he know things like how exactly to get to Viktor's commune and the fact they're going to lose the fight, etc etc etc.?"
I think it would have been cool and very fitting for Jayce but I will admit, the story we got covers all of this too.
Jayce's aging could easily be the product of extreme hardship (I wouldn't be surprised if the animators referred to images of people who have been, say, stranded on desert islands or prisoners of war for long periods to inform just how much Jayce's face muscles wasted away while he was there and just how much extreme hardship can age you because it can be extreme even within a few months and between pain, starvation, dehydration, and magical gangrene, Jayce was going through it).
Jayce's comfort with the idea of killing Salo could just be a product of his hardship (killing and eating lizards with his bare hands lol yuck), or of understanding that assimilated people are already dead, effectively, and to stop that future he cannot hesitate at all. Also, maybe he just fucking hates that guy, which would be pretty understandable after Salo voted to banish him back in 1.02 and also is very funny to me, personally, that he was just a little more comfortable smooshing that particular Councilor than he would be literally anyone else.
And this is were I get to your question: how much does Jayce know? Presumably, if we go Watsonian, whatever Wizard Viktor believed he needed to know to actually thread this needle, because there's probably information he doesn't need to know too.
For example, Jayce might know:
He cannot let a Cultist get back to Viktor with Hexgems. Salo needs to go. Who knows what this prevented but I can easily see how Viktor having more power right now to prolong his healing/assimilation would be a bad thing regardless. Also just... having Salo at all as a potential power player that Viktor could work through.
He knows where the commune is. In theory, he probably could just ask someone in Zaun too I mean, I doubt it's a secret, and narratively we don't need to see that.
He knows he cannot under any circumstances let Viktor talk to him once they're face to face. He can't even look at Viktor after Viktor knows he's there. There's a heavy implication that if Cult Leader Viktor so much as smiles at him, Jayce will fold, if we believe the little flash of memory of Jayce remembering him smiling at him isn't just Dead Wive Vision but is actually Anomaly Future Jayce warning him about what happened to him to lead t that point, which I think is a baller theory.
He can't give into Viktor, ever. He can't let Viktor touch his forehead before the right time. Jayce fights like mad to get away from that robot once Viktor decides that Jayce will be his partner again or else.
He knows he needs to take all the Hexgems out of the base of the Hexgate, but is it to stop Viktor? Or is to buy a few extra seconds while Viktor plugs them back in again so that Ekko has time to wake up? This is the sort of thing where Wizard Viktor might know the real reason for something but doesn't need to get that granular with why because it's about buying time, not actually preventing the Herald from grabbing the Anomaly.
By the way, I have a theory that one reason Jayce needs to get the gem burned into his wrist is because there's universes where his bracelet gets cut off and he loses the gem so Wizard Viktor is like, "This is gonna suck, but you really need this thing embedded in your flesh so it's there at the right time." Though, it could also be so he can engage the magic in his Alt Universe hammer. Still, I am a little sad that it's not an effect of Jayce universe hopping where some battle got it burned into him, because that was my original theory and I'm still very partial to it.
Jayce knows that he has no chance of winning the fight, he just needs to survive it. Once he gets to the top of the tower, once he grasps the hammer, it's all over. From that point on, the only thing he can do is have faith and get his big Power of Love speech ready, that is his only chance.
As for what Jayce is surprised by, I do think he might have been told information but not shown it necessarily. I am still really sad we didn't get a visual of what Wizard Viktor told him but, at the same time, one of the fun parts of Arcane is that it doesn't spoon-feed us, which gives us the chance for discussions like this, so wanting that scene is me being a Jayce addict not because I think it would necessarily strengthen the story.
So I think Jayce doesn't know what Machine Herald Viktor looks like. It's possible that Wizard Viktor doesn't either, because that didn't happen to Wizard Viktor, he didn't get slowed down at the commune, Jayce probably joined him there and probably didn't fight him at all, there's a strong hint that Anomaly Universe Jayce surrendered to Viktor at the top of the tower (the explosion marks around him are behind him, which implies that the force of his conversion might have been in front and willing, like he was kneeling before his king, and we don't have the top of his head to know which direction the fingerprints are positioned in).
So basically, Machine Herald Viktor is a product of Viktor needing Singed to regain enough power to go get the Anomaly, which Wizard Viktor didn't need to do.
It's possible that Wizard Viktor doesn't know about Ekko, he just knows that something outside his awareness has to happen for MH Viktor to be caught off guard, and as MH Viktor says, "That device cannot be," he cannot in his infinite knowledge account for what happens in a world where Hextech never got beyond its infancy with Jayce and Viktor at the helm.
So, at a certain point, there may have been things that Jayce and Wizard Viktor just had to rely on faith to come about too.
But it's way more fun to speculate because I think we'd be punching holes in it instead of speculating on it if we had been given this whole download.
Hope that answers your question??
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arcane, shipping and “word of god” within queer readings
tldr: “word of god” vs “death of the author” through the lens of jayvik
so first of all, here’s linke’s now-infamous reaction to jayvik:
first of all, there’s the classic mistake of conflating asexuality with aromanticism (they can and do overlap, but having one does not automatically mean the other)
to be clear: asexual viktor is not a bad concept. i’ve seen arguments for and against it that bring up valid points (there’s also the question of whether it’s a stereotype to make the disabled character asexual, but i’m not disabled, so i don’t really know the fine details of that debate?), but the questionable thing here is that it seems to have been brought up specifically against a jayvik interpretation
aside from this i’ve seen twitter screenshots floating around where it looks like linke is arguing with people about jayvik? idk—
sigh.
i’m not even going to get into this.
ironically, and unfortunately for linke, a piece of media the fans drew an immediate parallel to is the ending of the magnus archives with two of the main characters jon and martin dying together to save the universe, and they are both a canonical couple and jon is explicitly confirmed to be ace within the universe by dialogue between characters
amanda overton, luckily, is a breath of fresh air:
the first part of what overton says is similar to linke—written with a brotherly love, etc.—but while linke uses this as a ��gotcha!” moment to shut down discussion, overton rightly recognizes that “other people give it their own meaning”—that art exists as dialogue with the audience where intent and interpretation do not necessarily align
honestly, what strikes me the most when contrasted with linke is the lack of possessiveness here, as linke clings to the original intentions of the writers like a lifeline whereas overton has set her creation free into the wild with serenity
which can also be rephrased to mean that linke believes in the power of word of god
so word of god is extremely interesting when it comes to the history of queer media
from the korrasami being confirmed via word of god because of network restrictions that meant they had their hands tied when it came to the text of the show, but still making a huge step in the direction of explicit queer rep
to hannigram, where the ship has an incredibly solid textual base within the universe (with “is hannibal in love with me?” “yes” being actual lines), but shipping wiki still has it as “canon (confirmed by bryan fuller)” as if because it’s a queer couple, it needs that extra layer of assurance when for a straight ship it would have less scrutiny
so these two examples have been instances of positive word of god—cases where the creators intentionally wrote in queerness
and media creators have not always been so supportive—just look at the 2010s epidemic of queerbaiting
BUT HERE’S THE THING: the “word of god” stands in near direct contrast with another incredibly useful tool—“death of the author,” which posits that authors essentially lose authority over the meaning of their work and that the work can be analyzed contradicting the authorial intent if there is textual evidence to support it (grossly oversimplified)
essentially, the “death of the author” approach happened a lot in fandoms that had “hostile” creators (moff and gatis mocking fans for shipping, both within and without the show sherlock, for example)
and the thing about fandoms is that it’s great when the creator is on our side! but if not? we’re going to be just fine on our own, we’ve survived like that for decades
and here comes 2024, a year rich with queer content and the practice of queer readings having lost a fair bit of the stigma that was long associated with it (with special mention to the good omens and ofmd fan readings before and after the episodes with kissing were released)
and linke is… still stuck in a 2010s mindset??? like i’m not sure how to explain it more elegantly. do not be like linke
in contrast, amanda overton has the much more nuanced view of fandom and fan interpretations, where she can both acknowledge authorial intent and that differing interpretations will exist and that they still carry weight. be like amanda overton
#arcane#arcane analysis#fandom#christian linke#amanda overton#shipping#jayvik#long post#death of the author#word of god
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Your latest time-travel verse made me rewatch Kyoraku vs Starrk battle over Fake Katakura.
I have to say, over the years, I have forgotten how sad that battle is. The way Starrk mourns even Barragan's death and loses his (already small to begin with) desire to fight after it... The only reason the guy followed Aizen was because Aizen gave him... friends😭 A pack. The only reason he fought was to protect that pack. Doesn't matter if that pack consisted of some shady individuals. It was his. The first and only one he got in all his 1000+ years of existence. He had no desire to strike down his enemies - didn't kill Ukitake, proposed Love and Rose to retreat with their lives... In a way, he and Ichigo are very much alike in that sense.
Starrk was too honorable and naive and paid for that.
And Shunsui killed Lilynette😭 It is so heartrending when Starrk calls out to her with no answer...
Shunsui's philosophy, on the contrary, allows him "to be evil" in order to win. Yes, he does not like war, just like Starrk, but IMHO, "as soon as the war starts both sides are at fault" does not mean Shunsui is saying that both sides are wrong in the war and to not fight till you completely disable / kill your opponent. I think, to paraphrase, it means: "As soon as the war start, to win, both sides *will* have to be evil / There are no good people in a war because winning a war requires one to do evil things, so someone who were maybe a good person will have to become evil to win". This philosophy, basically, is "to unbound his hands" (as we say in our language, meaning when something is used to make a person free to act), a workaround that allows him to be ruthless to his opponents, despite his pacifistic nature.
Anyway, emotional rant over. I guess I just wanted to share my pain🥲 I just hope Shunsui killing a part of Starrk's soul and the only family he had will somehow be addressed between them in the future in your fic's universe. I think it's just too huge to leave out. And the only way I can see Starrk never saying anything at all to his Shunsui in TYBW timeline - is because he is THAT much of a sucker for pain and/or THAT much desperate for a genuine connection with somebody.
Starrk is just a really tragic character with a really tragic arc, canonically he was never meant to be saved or have a chance at something better.
I don't know if I'd call him particularly honourable, if only because that doesn't seem like the sort of thing he'd really think about and adhere to as a Hollow who'd spent his whole life in a place like Hueco Mundo, not in the same way a Shinigami would. I think it was more that he just didn't want to kill anyone when he'd already killed so many without ever having a choice in the matter, and now that he did, he didn't want to keep doing that if he didn't absolutely have to. He was definitely a bit naive about it because it was war, and he was up against one of the most powerful and ruthless Shinigami in existence. The moment he decided to hold back, he was destined to lose.
For Shunsui, I agree, he believes that to win a war, people have to get their hands dirty, and you can't do that and still remain "good". I also think he thinks that it's disrespectful to not do everything in his power to win, because even if that means throwing away his honour, to do anything less means risking the lives of those he's fighting that war for.
Which ties into why I personally think Starrk doesn't really blame Shunsui for Lilynette's death. I think Starrk is smart enough and similar enough to Shunsui to understand him. And why blame Shunsui when he can blame himself? He's the one who held back from the start, he didn't fight as hard as he could, he even had the chance to kill Shunsui if he'd just gone down to finish the job after shooting him instead of just backing off after disabling him, or he could've even shot him somewhere more leathal like the back of the head instead of the shoulder/chest, because at their level, which Shinigami or Hollow wouldn't survive a simple injury like that? He would've also been able to sense full well that Shunsui's reiatsu signature hadn't disappeared. So that choice is on him, and he paid for it with Lilynette's life.
I also think Starrk didn't have much conviction or resolve, I mean I don't think most of the Espada really believed in Aizen's cause, they just followed him for more power or because Aizen tricked them or forced them, and prob with a side of hypnosis to pave the way. So Starrk didn't even have anything concrete to believe in and fight for aside from a debt he felt he had to repay, and that was quickly wearing away when he saw how Aizen didn't give a shit about them.
So overall, he went into battle against Shunsui without any desire to fight or kill because he thought he didn't really have anything he wanted enough to fight for, right up until he lost Lilynette and realized that yeah he did have something precious to lose after all. In contrast, Shunsui was fighting for Soul Society and to protect his fellow Shinigami, and at the time, he definitely understood that far better than Starrk did.
If Starrk had survived, I think he would've understood that too, plus he just doesn't have the kind of temper that lashes out and casts blame on others due to excess emotion; rather, he has the sort of analytical mind to comprehend the cause and effect of things pretty instantly. That would all play a big part in why he wouldn't blame Shunsui for doing what he had to do to take Starrk out. He and Lilynette were one, Shunsui would've had to kill both of them sooner or later, otherwise he might as well lie down and give up, Starrk wasn't exactly an opponent he could take it easy with.
In the time travel verse here, Idk if I'd make it a particularly huge thing, because for Starrk it's been like 10+ years, I imagine he's laid that ghost to rest a long time ago even if the loss still hurts sometimes, plus it's not TBTP!Shunsui who killed her, and i think he would've hashed out the issue with TYBW!Shunsui already at the beginning. Of course, TBTP!Shunsui is bound to find out about it eventually, which could be interesting to poke at.
But in Take What's Broken (Make It Whole), it'll definitely come up sooner or later. Even if Starrk doesn't bring it up first, Shunsui will, and even if there's no blame, I imagine they would at least have to talk about it going forward.
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If you are such a hore for charles rn, maybe we could get more sugar daddy charles? Maybe him punishing you for some reason?
you're spoiling me so badly right now PUHLEASE
bon's thoughts (18+)
sugardaddy!charles had specifically told you to get back home at 8:00 because he was going to take you out for dinner. you should've known your friends had different plans for you, though. they knew about your arrangement with the older man, and they couldn't stop giggling. you had asked charles to buy you some expensive purses, and he was happy that you were asking him to indulge you so he bought them. only problem was that you had gotten them for your friends who kept pestering you in between classes for those items. every time you’d sneak a new gucci bag for your best friend, you’d grow more worried that charles would one day ask you where all the bags he bought for you were. his money was only for you, not for your friends.
you received a text from charles at 6:30, asking you to finish your last class and head over to his place so you could wear an elegant red dress he bought you, and the gucci bag. you freak out, turning to your friend and begging her to give the bag back just for tonight but she frowned, telling you the bag was all the way back at her house 500 miles from the university. you nearly fainted at her words. charles was going to punish you for this, you were sure of it. so, you decided to do what you always did - ignore his texts because truth be told, you did like the angry sex that followed - but it was better than him not gifting you anything if he found out you’d been giving them to your friends, little miss saint.
“where’s the bag?” was the first question charles asked you when you finally returned home, “i searched all over your closet, mon chérie, i cannot find any of your bags.”
you gulp, awkwardly laughing, “a-about that actually…”
charles is laughing at the dinner table with some of his colleagues. he had been laughing this entire time, which you thought was a good sign but then again, he was never this cheerful. some of the people at the table stand up to grab some extra food, and you turn to face charles, leaning in to whisper into his ear,
"y-you're not mad at me?" you ask.
"mad? no," he responds, and you let out a sigh in relief, "no, i'm fuming, my love."
your jaw drops, and you feel him squeeze your thigh harshly, enough for it to hurt just a tiny bit. your eyes snap down to where his thumb is caressing the fat of your skin before he snickers under his breath, "my money is for your benefit. if i wanted to give money to your friends, i'd be a charity foundation, not your sugar daddy, is that clear?"
you nod your head, "i-i'm sorry, i kept trying to tell them no but they wouldn't listen! i would never try to go against you like that, you know-" your words are cut off as his fingers trail up your thigh, cupping your heat. you stiffen in your seat, making sure no one was looking to see what was happening under the table. charles' fingertips drag along your clothed cunt, and he smiles at the way you're squirming in your seat, begging him to stop, "no, not now. what if someone sees?"
"let everyone see how i use you, how you're mine and only mine. i must fuck you too hard because your brain just can't seem to understand it, hm? ma chérie, you're on the thinnest of ice as we speak right now. you're going to take my fingers for the rest of the night, and not a word out of you. not one sound." charles kisses your cheek, fingers pushing your panties to the side before collecting your arousal around your slick folds. you bite your tongue, trying not to whimper when his fingers push into your entrance, teasing you mercilessly. when the guests start coming back, you squish your thighs together as an effort to stop him but he glares at you, using his free hand to hold your thigh open as his fingers curl inside you.
"dinner's really good, right?" a woman asks you and you moan out loud,
"mhm, so good," you force a smile, narrowing your eyes at charles who's pumping his fingers faster inside you, a proud look on his face,
"my baby loves restaurants like this, i would take her to each one if she didn't want to waste my money so much," his eyes flicker at you, loving the way you're clearly struggling to hold it together. no noise, no sound, those words echo in your mind and you take massive bites of your food to occupy your mouth so you won't accidentally slip out another moan. thankfully, a performance in the background had just ended as the audience roars into applause, you let out a guttural moan that's disguised. you slump against your chair, chest heaving as charles pulls his fingers out and sucks your juices off, licking them clean before staring at you,
"if they ask, i'll tell them you're in the bathroom. they'll leave in a few minutes to the bar anyway," he instructs and you open your mouth to argue but he's quickly shoving you under the table. you want to use his money for your friends, wasting his time and energy to buy whatever you want? you can wait and do what he wants now, he doesn't care. he unbuckles his belt carefully, eyes flickering to his friends whose backs face him. they're too busy watching the singer on stage pour her heart out into a verse. he chuckles as he wraps the table's cloth around your face, only your mouth visible to him and he pulls out his throbbing member, shoving it down your throat without warning. your gags are silenced instantly and charles grips the back of your head, thrusting ruthlessly into your mouth as tears slip your eyes,
"you like it when i use you like this, right?" charles whispers, crouching down to make it look like he's on his phone, "fuck, using my money for your friends? how sweet, so sweet of you, mon chérie. so kind and helpful! i didn't know my little girl was this sweet to her friends at the expense of my money." he hisses, hands going under the table to yank your hair so that your mouth could open even wider for him. his balls slap against your chin, and he has to quiet his grunts as his thrusts become more erratic.
"fuck, i cannot wait to take you back home and fuck you properly. make sure you cannot walk for days so you won't come up with something stupid like this again." he scoffs, groaning under his breath as he shoots ropes of his cum down your throat. when he pulls out, he admires the sight of his cum dribbilng down your neck, dropping onto your full breasts that almost spill out of your dress.
"stay there for 5 minutes." charles says, "in the meantime, make yourself useful for me," and he sticks his thumb in your mouth, watching you suck diligently as he waits for his friends to leave.
#bon's anons#bon's thoughts#bon's asks#charles leclerc smut#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x reader smut#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc x female reader smut#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc x you smut#charles leclerc imagines#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc headcanons#charles leclerc one shots#f1 smut#f1 x reader#f1 x reader smut#f1 x you#f1 x you smut#f1 x female reader#f1 x female reader smut#f1 headcanons#f1 imagines#f1 drabbles
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My theory is that Blake wants to discredit justin because he owns the rights for the second book (sequel to this one?! Idk). And she wants to make this her own franchise now. It's purely business reasons.
And saying that he launched a smear campaign against her in the media ... Well, she did it too! She launched her own smear campaign against him with the promo for the movie. Infact the talk about this movie took off with discussions that there was something not quite right between Justin and Blake. So she used those tactics herself.
Now, ofcourse, if more comes out about this and it turns out Justin is a bad guy, I will eat the humble pie and admit my mistake and send out an apology into the universe that gets to blake via the ethers. (Mainly because I'm scared of her mean girl tactics). But from what justins lawyers has said , it turns out he did change his behaviour and rectified whatever whas bothering blake on the sets.
But so far, it looks like this is a clash between two very dominant personalities, one of them being girl bosswannabe blake who wanted to break free from her image as Ryan reynolds' baby making machine ans was actually hoping to win some awards with this movie.
Most of the things blake was called out for wasn't internet constructs via pr plants. People saw her behavior during the promos and reacted. That old interview with the Swedish/Danish/Norwegian journalist where ("congrats on your little bump") was what did the most damage. That wasn't Justin's doing.
That's where I am too - she's trying to discredit him for the sequel rights and/or profit.
But I do think it's important that we acknowledge there's validity to Blake's allegations, because it has been acknowledged by others on set that Justin was confronted about his behavior and afterwards, there was noticeable and marked improvement in his behavior and in conditions on set.
I also think that some of the things Blake is upset about is, like you pointed out, her own behavior and attitude in the promotions of the film. People were really and genuinely upset she was promoting the film as bubbly and frothy rom-com when the subject matter was this heavy and triggering. Of course people are going to be angry at a bait-and-switch and when Blake dismisses their concerns so breezily to promote her brand and merch Louboutins instead - of course they're going to turn on her.
Since there are more stories about Blake's bad behavior -- making light of Kategate and then apologizing via IG story (which deleted after 24 hours so it's a nonapology), sleeping with Ryan on Green Lantern while he was still married to Scarlett, sleeping with Ben Affleck on The Town while he was married to Jennifer Garner, being a Weinstein apologist, feuding with everyone on Gossip Girl, feuding with Anna Kendrick, having a plantation wedding, using slurs for the transgender community -- than there are about Justin...
But that doesn't mean Justin can't be a horrible person or that he couldn't target Blake. He can and he could.
All it means is that this is messy and the courts have a heck of a job ahead of them - the real court, the Hollywood court, and the court of public opinion.
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Hey, yall do super cool work, thank you for everything yall do <3
I was wondering if you could find any BPD Crowley fics? It isn’t have to be specifically centric, but just written with that headcanon in mind/referenced/mentioned, just about anything that mentions it 😅😅😅 Original universe if possible
tysm again for everything you do, I've been using your blog for fic recs for a WHILE now, super super useful and wonderful :]
Hello! While compiling this list I realised that a couple of these fics are yours, but I've added them for completeness and so others can enjoy them. Here are some fics in which Crowley has (or at least is implied to have) borderline personality disorder...
In This Twilight, How Dare You Speak Of Grace by cosmickaiju (T)
They can't bear to hear his pity. Can't bear the thought of Aziraphale thinking they're just like any other demon.
My World Can't Turn Without You by LvndrLemonade (M)
Crowley is convinced he's been abandoned for good, and doesn't see the point in going on. Upstairs in Heaven, Aziraphale's plans to stop the Second Coming are hastily interrupted by a sudden feeling of terrible dread.
Delicate by midnightdragons (T)
Aziraphale tries to comfort Crowley after waking him from a nightmare.
i was born sick (but i love it) by sonderrrr (T)
After he regains his breath, he falters three words. Three words that Crowley had prayed he would never have to hear again. Because it meant he was wrong. “I forgive you.” What was he being forgiven for? Initiating a kiss that was unwarranted? Not going with his Angel? Being a demon? Being unlovable? Sighing, Crowley shakes his head and starts for the door. “Don’t bother.”
The Great (not) Gatsby by luckythirt33n, LvndrLemonade (G)
Can't repeat the past? ...of course you can! Ever since being assigned to the states, Crowley has been, admittedly, lonely. He hosts grand, sinful, parties under an alter ego, so he can get Hell of his back, and simply bides his time to get back home. That changes when Aziraphale joins him in the United States, sent on a vague mission from Heaven to 'check in on things.' Though, their newfound time together isn't as simple as it should be; Crowley has gotten into some political hot-water with activity in his overwhelming free time, and the sudden appearance of a mystery man may be what can solidify a rather scandalous article that's bound to hit the front covers of every newspaper in the nation. Aziraphale and Crowley will have to balance want with need, thousands of years of pining finally bubbling to the surface. Will they be able to get their happy ending *and* keep each other safe?
Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it by mr_clairdycat (T)
"That said, this angel and this demon love each other in the way someone who loves God does, that much is objective. Their love is patient and kind, it doesn't insist in its own way, it is not irritable or resentful, nor does it rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. That’s how it truly is; their love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Most importantly, however, it will never end. Does not matter whether everyone in the universe isagainst it, they will persevere till the end of their never-ending life. That considered, who could’ve known if God was truly against it in the first place, if this was a test, if this was their plan. But maybe, just maybe it is useless to ponder at such question. Cause that’s what these two are: indescribable, unimaginable, forbidden, wonderful. They are just ineffable."
- Mod D
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The Silco Saga, Part Two*: Vander and Silco haunt the narrative (and are kinda gay for each other)
*This is the second (well, actually third) post in a series I’ve lovingly dubbed “The Silco Saga, a retrospective after Season 2”. It’s halfway between flow of conscience, meta, headcanon and review, spawned from my Arcane brainrot (and recent S1 rewatch) and vaguely aimed at trying to reevaluate the entirety of Arcane with a focus on my Main Man™ Silco. Here is Part 1 (on how S2 handled Silco and Jinx’s relationship) and Part 1.5 (miscellaneous thoughts regarding timeline issues and Silco’s actions towards the kids in S1ep3).
Please feel free to comment! I love hearing different perspectives on this show.
Also, quick disclaimer (just in case it wasn’t clear from the title of this post): I ship them. Don’t like, don’t read. And I swear to God, if I hear anyone say “but they’re brothers!!!1!”, know that I’m going to curse your entire genome until the thermal death of the Universe. Bye.
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Vander’s original sin
The portrayal of Vander that emerges from S1 and S2 is that of a man who is trying to do good by his people, but is plagued by guilt and shame due to the horrific acts of violence he committed in the past. S2 clearly shows us that the events of the Day of Ash and the subsequent attempted murder of his best friend/comrade/homoerotic situationship (I’m looking at you, Brokeback Mountain jackets) were intensely traumatic not just for Silco, but for Vander as well. I’ll admit I didn’t much care for him in S1 (mostly because of his goody-two-shoes aura which most of the fandom seemed to latch on to), but I think the elements S2 added to his backstory turned him into a wonderfully complex and contradictory character. It cements something I already kind of sensed about him in S1: that there’s a distinct layer of hypocrisy in Vander’s strict adherence to pacifism (to the point of inaction), which is not really a byproduct of a deeply held personal belief about the ethics of non-violence, but instead a way to cope with his guilt about Silco and the other victims of the Day of Ash revolt. Vander chooses to “atone” for his sins by suppressing all forms of violence, both internal and external, thus generating a safe but stifling environment in which the Lanes survive, but arguably cannot thrive long-term. And in line with Arcane’s tragic narrative, he gets ultimately punished for it: he’s forced to loose all that he holds dear (Silco, the kids and his peaceful little world) and to ultimately embody what he hates and fears most about himself (being a violent monster only capable of destruction).
During my first watch of S2 I couldn’t really figure out whether I liked or not the fact that Felicia’s death was the reason for Vander’s “betrayal” of Silco (it felt a bit contrived and love-triangle-y), but after giving it much thought I have decided that, in fact, I quite like it. It plays heavily into the theme of guilt being central to Vander’s character, and how this guilt really ends up snowballing into something completely unmanageable. Guilt about Felicia (and probably many others that died on that day) leads him to turn on Silco; and later, guilt about Silco ultimately makes him give up all violent means of revolution because he’s too afraid to harm the people he loves. Guilt also becomes a motivating factor for his adoption of Vi and Powder, since we now know he’s not just selflessly picking up two strays, but acting on a promise done to a dear friend who’s just died because of him. The fact that the details of his “betrayal” of Silco are kept pretty much a secret also reeks of guilt and shame. There’s this layer of selfishness and cowardice to his actions that I find very refreshing for a character that’s introduced to us as the closest thing to a paragon of virtue in all of Arcane.
It’s deeply tragic how his inability to properly deal with his past impacts the rest of the narrative; perhaps, had he told Vi the real reason for his unwillingness to rise against Piltover, and not the wishy-washy “violence bad, be responsible” speech, she would have been less rash and black-and-white in her thinking.
I wish S2 spend more time on the two sisters reflecting on Vander and Silco’s relationship. While it’s natural for us to draw parallels between the dyads Vi-Jinx and Vander-Silco, in reality their situations are quite different. There was no ‘betrayal’ between Vi and Jinx, just two grief-stricken children unable to handle an immensely tragic situation; but, due to the ‘lessons’ imparted to them from their ‘parents’ (lessons which themselves were distorted due to their own inability to deal with their past), they are led to believe their situation is as hopelessly unsolvable as it was for Vander and Silco.
The letter
I still haven’t decided on whether the letter would have worked on Silco or not. I think timing plays a big factor. The Silco we meet in arc 1 of S1 probably wouldn’t have been swayed; he’s already too set in his “rebirth” mentality, and the new man he has become doesn’t care about Vander’s sentimental platitudes. A younger Silco, with less time to crystallize into his new identity… maybe. I think the Best Timeline of S2ep7 (yes, that’s what I’m calling it) sort of implies that Silco got the letter almost immediately, given the state of his wound (and the absence of Shimmer).
I wonder if we are also meant to implicitly understand that his use of Shimmer in the Worst Timeline (a.k.a. Arcane, the Netflix show) had some kind of negative influence on his psyche. After all, Shimmer does seem to impact the emotions of its users; if it did influence Silco’s radicalization, it would make his story doubly tragic. I’ve always found his use of Shimmer an interesting tidbit in S1, and the fact that the show doesn’t explain it very much beyond using it to show the amount of trust between him and Jinx has always been very intriguing to me.
Anyway. I think that, in any case, the letter would have been only the first step in Silco and Vander’s trajectory towards reconciliation. They both have a lot of issues to unpack; I love the headcanon going around that one of Silco’s prerequisites to their “peace treaty” is for Vander to rejoin the political fight for Zaun. It sounds just so… in character for Silco to demand something like that; it acts as both a justification and a shield, preventing him to expose himself too much at the beginning, while ensuring that he and Vander remain close.
I think it was already clear in S1 that they both secretly craved to be close again, especially Silco, given how hard he still tried to convince Vander to work with him in S1ep3. (Which is kind of insane of him, if you think about it, but I guess working closely with the man who tried to murder you — and almost succeeded — kinda fits into his whole “almost dying turned me into an Übermensch” philosophy?) Now, with Vander’s letter in S2, we know for a fact the feeling was mutual. Which is, again, horribly tragic for them both, because they’re both so set in their respective ways that actual reconciliation is made impossible.
And they were miners (oh my God they were miners)
Since we’re already kind of on the topic of whether or not Zaundads is real (or just the fruit of our collective hallucination), let’s give to Caesar wha belongs to Caesar: I don’t think the writers meant for them to turn out that way. Their dialogue doesn’t particularly strike me as hinting to anything beyond a very close friendship.
… The animators, however? Those French fucks (affectionate) knew what they were doing. The imagery of the jackets stored one inside the other cannot be a coincidence. There’s really no other cinematic parallel I can think of that doesn’t ultimately lead back to Brokeback Mountain. They were insane for that, and I’m deeply thankful to their perverted French minds (extremely affectionate) that they had the balls to just… put it there. No further comment. Just a glaring nod to the gayest movie ever.
(Also, Brokeback Mountain’s most iconic quote — “I wish I knew how to quit you” — perfectly applies to Vander and Silco. They just can’t seem to let each other go. Silco is still harping on about Vander years after he died. Vander can’t even bear to mention Silco in S1, and the moment they meet again the first thing he blurts out is “I’m sorry”, right after Silco murdered his friend — RIP king Benzo, you didn’t deserve it — in front of him. They match each other’s freak so well, I tell you.)
And then Silco’s scene in the Best Timeline. Just… the touching. The tenderness. The affection. Benzo going “ack!” at them while they gaze lovingly into each other’s eyes. It’s just… chef’s kiss. No further comment. Is it, perhaps, self indulgent? Yes. Is Silco’s line about forgiveness cheesy and a bit out of left field? Yes. Do I wish Ekko had more time to ask him what he meant by that, and get in on their backstory (since it would have been deeply meaningful for him too, given how much he idolizes Vander)? Yes.
(Someone please write me fanfiction of this scene. I beg you. I would do it myself but I lack the talent.)
Would I also watch 10 seasons of them being gay married and doing the most irrelevant domestic nonsense? Shamelessly. My poor blorbos deserve it.
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Saw a post the other day that was like oh my god s2 of Arcane ruined everyone's characters that really rubbed me the wrong way. The post outlined every single way in which the show failed its characters, and they were all true, but it didn't sit right with me.
Like, I do think there were a few fumbles, but I didn't get a sense that the characters were behaving OOC for the most part?
And then I realized.
Yeah, every single character except Ekko and Heimerdinger became their worst selves. They lost sight of who they were, and did stupid, horrific things. But all of that is because the main Arcane universe is about two steps removed from the literal worst case scenario. Arcane is basically a tragedy. These characters were never supposed to stay true to their values and do the right thing.
Of course Cait became a dictator and Vi became her own worst nightmare. Of course Viktor became obsessed with fixing everyone at the cost of their free will. Of course Jayce set aside innovation and helping people in favor of playing politics and then destruction.
The entire show revolves around Hextech, and as we learn in season 2, it's inherently corruptive. What kind of stupid show wouldn't pair moral corruption and literal corruption?
#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane s2#meta analysis#obviously if you hated s2 that's your prerogative#but i hope this is food for thought#also do not come on here to angrily tell me why i'm wrong. if you disagree that strongly just move on
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if you are 1) currently in a university where your student healthcare covers hormone therapy, and 2) in a good financial, emotional, and social position to start hormone therapy, i would recommend pursuing it. because in my experience, it's a huge pain in the ass to get an endocrinologist once you're on your own
#unless you live near a planned parenthood or another equivalent to that#but in general you might as well take advantage of the mandatory student health insurance while you have it#it's also cheaper than you might expect. my vials cost $40 CAD for 4 months and then the injection materials are like a couple dollars each#for me i got a therapist with the university and asked them to recommend me to one of the uni's doctors#so i got to skip some of the waitlisting process yay#and then even after getting access to hormones i went to the clinic maybe 5 or 6 times because i needed a nurse to help me with injections#all of which was 'free' because it was with the university#now that i'm graduated though i need to find a new endocrinologist and it turns out the process is WAY more complicated on your own 🤡#of course your mileage may vary depending on how based your school is but it's definitely worth checking imo 🤷#beepbeep.txt#wanted to say this because i basically didn't use the uni health services until my last year and i was like 'wow#'i'm actually getting so much shit for free right now'#like i was seeing a therapist and a dietician and the endocrinologist and a nurse simultaneously at one point#and i might've missed out on all that if i didn't have someone tell me how easy it was to get help if you ask the right questions#so there's my word of wisdom for anyone who might benefit from it.......#also going to post tips about injections later because i think that would also help people out 👍
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On autonomy, and what it means to be Obliged to Help.
Bonus:
#a homestuck walks into an antechamber and asks#hey is anybody going to make this dynamic wholly deterministic and thus dubiously consensual by its very nature#ANYWAY bigger ramble below. scroll down like usual#isat spoilers#isat#isat fanart#isat siffrin#isat loop#sifloop#THATS RIGHT WE'RE STILL SHIP TAGGING IT BABYYYY#in stars and time#in stars and time fanart#lucabyteart#RAMBLE START: anyway i think loop is wrong here. they have it backwards. as-- in my opinion--#the main reason they could be called back into existence postcanon is because *their* wish for help is still not complete#they still need help. siffrin still needs help. neither of them will ever stop needing help.#they will thus uphold the wish until the end of siffrin's natural lifespan.#that said. what does it mean that loop can be so wholly forced to abide by siffrin's wants?#(assuming the dagger cutscene posession is them being forced to uphold the 'help siffrin' wish via harsh universe logic)#[as opposed to something capricious and cruel the change god did. which feels out of character for the change god to me?]#much like how the island wish and duplicate objects are neutered by simply sliding off people's brains...#is loop subtly ushered toward their wish? obviously it's not a full override (see: the bossfight). but is there any interference?#and if so. so what? does it matter? if they don't notice? is it even real if they don't notice?#and even if they do notice. the universe leads we follow. how much do either of them value their free will in a belief system like that?#the whole game is dedicated to siffrin habitually NOT excersizing his free will. doing things the same Every Time.#Loop ESPECIALLY does this. predetermined predetermined predetermined even in the FACE OF CHANGE. REFUSING. ANY CHOICE.#Maybe they'd even be comforted by having a universe-ordained purpose even if it is subservient. even if its to Him.#(though. i can't see siffrin enjoying the idea that someone is subservient TO them... then all their suffering is his fault...)#loop got into this mess via WANTING too much. no more free will. can't be trusted with it. take it away from them.#but yeah. gets my greasy detective pony hands all over this. and everyone please do remember i like to make characters Outright Wrong A Lot
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Honestly shoutout to Steven Universe for the representation of malachite and abusive relationships because it holds up really well and is still like one of the only abuse narratives I’ve seen that portrays how like. Abusive relationships aren’t as simple as “evil abusive person was constantly Mean and Bad to nice victim” like. Lapis is a realistic victim. She refused to leave the relationship because she longed to have connection with someone and she liked feeling as though she could have control for once, even though she really didn’t. She wasn’t nice and innocent, she felt anger and resentment and liked taking it out on Jasper. And despite how horrible it was, she deeply misses Jasper because it was the longest and deepest relationship she’s ever had with anyone and she didn’t know how to function without it
But Lapis is still a victim and we’re meant to care for her and understand where she comes from. She chose to stay with Jasper to keep others safe from her harm, and because she thought she herself deserved the abuse as a way of making up for everything bad she’s done. Jasper reminds Lapis over and over that she is a monster and that’s why they should be together, because Jasper is the only one who understands her. And when Lapis finally rejects their relationship, she mostly states it through what she herself felt and has done, saying that she didn’t like the person she became in that relationship and she never wants to feel like that ever again. It’s messy and complicated, just like how actual abuse is
Anyways yeah talk about a very good abuse narrative thanks steven universe
#steven universe#tw abuse#yeah im rewatching the show and im re remembering that im a lapis stan#the people who hated her were just really mad that she wasnt a perfect victim and its like yeah duh thats the point#shes been through a lot of trauma and does whatever she can to survive and sometimes its fucked up#but after all that she still deserves to be safe and to be loved and to be free because shes a person whos trying to better herself and heal#also its fucked that su is probably like one of the only things ive watched that portrays imperfect victims so well#which is crazy given how its the sparkly rock show for kids
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Linktober 2024, Day 1, Mirror (Self)
Alright here we go again.
Technically a sneak peak of a bigger thing to come in the future that I'm repurposing, and the result of my final playthrough and readthrough before EoW dropped being Four Swords Adventures and that made me sad about Shadow Link again.
Note that this is for the Four Swords Adventures iteration of Shadow Link that might evolve into an LU Shadow, not Dark Link in either LOZ or LU, I have other plans for him.
This one shot was brought to you by Scars by The Crane Wives, Ribs by The Crane Wives, Ruin by The Amazing Devil and Two Minutes by The Amazing Devil because the author's playlist decided to be incredibly cheeky when they blacked out to write this like an ancient seers being cursed with visions and then called mad and hearing they've been put up for execution.
As always the nature of the relationship can be romantic or platonic, mostly due to the author's time constraints and further plans.
Anyway enjoy the reading!
It was cold.
The sort of cold after a wildfire, when everything's turned back to ash, the sort that left burned your vision white after the flames licked through your veins and left an ache in your bones. He shuddered, coughed black onto the stone floor, shaking with a muffled whimper.
It never got any easier, being dragged from the Dark World and into the Realm of Light, the goddesses' world itself revolting against an intruder, wanting the wound torn asunder into their oh so precious realm cauterized. To purge the intrusion and smite it where it stands.
Too bad for them (and for him), his master didn't particularly care about what the world wanted. Didn't particularly care that he hadn't grow accustomed to the pain or the cold, he had to stand up. There was work to be done.
(Shadow gritted his teeth, willed himself not to think about the prophecy of a golden haired princess- because whether he liked it or not, it was prophecy. As those with divinity running through their veins are wont to spill from their throats so carelessly- of violet eyes and a smile a third moonlight and hands holding a hammer.
It always hurt more, after one of the heroes liberated one of the maidens, or the jewels, the pain lingering for days afterwards and carving a home in his metaphorical bones. But just this once he'd take the cold bite of the Four Swords over the pain in the hole in his chest that Vio's betrayal had left, something that felt so much worse than every other time before.
Just this once he wished that maybe, just maybe, the hurt would be too much to bear, that he wouldn't wake up again-
Why? Why does it hurt so much but he's still here? He already knew the Light was uncompromising and unforgiving, but he thought them at least above curses.)
His ears twitched as soft, almost silent footsteps came up to his side. Someone crouching by his fallen form, setting a cautious hand over his own that Shadow couldn't help but draw away from with a hiss, blinking as his eyes adjusted to the world again, to your face, carefully blank as you guided him to lean against your side, a silver choker with a crimson gem winked mockingly at him, the shade closing his eyes and going boneless against your side.
Shadow was so, so tired.
He heard you quietly sigh, plucking his cap from his head and running your fingers through dark amethyst, smoke and mist made hair. "I told you so."
"Shut up." He grumbled, nuzzling further into the crook of your neck. One clawed hand curling against your free wrist, digging into the skin. Absentmindedly noting there were new scratches just above the metal.
It was routine by now, the warmth of your existence against his own a welcome balm, not quite of the Realm of Light where it's unpleasant, not too close to the Dark World where he felt like melting back into the embrace of the darkness, only to howl in agony at being dragged out.
Memories not quite his own bled into his mind all the time. How you'd shape ice into flowers for the princess in winter with nary a though, of blinking and from one second to the next you'd have whatever sword he had hostage if you though it was time for a break with a smile brighter than the sun.
His master had changed that though. It took months for you to stop trying to claw the collar out and to stop trying to fight Vaati.
(Funny how holding a mage's dragon as a bargaining chip is just as effective as kidnapping a ruler.)
Your gaze flicked to the polished obsidian of the Dark Mirror, to the gold, ornate frame. "The offer is still open, you know. Let me take the suffering from you."
"No." He scowled, leaning back to glare into your eyes, a hint of fangs poking out from a maw struggling to keep the shape of a human jaw, "You helped him. Helped them." Shadow spat, there is that hurt again.
You shrugged, a movement that's just slightly awkward as you flinch, "That I did." You confirmed simply, it almost made Shadow see red as he leaned away, knocking your hand from his head in the process, but if there's anything him and the heroes shared, was a lack of a desire to hurt you. It was a little grating to be honest, "Vio even offered to take me with him, to be honest."
"Then why didn't you leave?" He demanded.
Why did you stick around?
Your eyes shuttered, a hint of conflict in your pursed lips. Before you found your words, they come out softly, "You wouldn't believe me if I told you why. You'll just have to find out yourself."
You tug your wrist from his grasp, and Shadow lets you go.
(Stubbornly pushing down on memories and emotions that arearen'tarenotanymore quite his.)
You stand and turn away, pushing the curtains away from your sight, you turn your tired eyes to Shadow with an emotion he can't put a name to. "Just keep it in mind that there's more than one way to end this. Nothing is truly inevitable."
Shadow watches you go. 'There's nothing that can be done. He tells himself, hand hesitating above the Dark Mirror, briefly, it curls into a fist. The hero's original self stares back at him.
'… Does he really believe that?'
He shakes his head, and focuses on willing the Dark Mirror to show him his counterpart.
His chest still hurts.
#summer writes linktober 2024#lu shadow x reader#well implied#shadow link x reader#lu vio x reader x shadow link#lu four x reader#if we count both Vio and Shadow as part of him which I both do and don't (it's complicated)#lu four x reader x lu shadow#You ever think that considering how Shadow isn't human and a reflection of someone else#that he likely struggles with human feelings and putting a proper name to them?#and that he might share memories and emotions with Four/Link and have a hard time discerning what is his and what isn't#and just possible identity issues in general from being separated from what's essentially every other part of himself?#because I do. A lot. It lives in my head rent free#man I want to write more about this guy#is Reader from Hyrule? Are they isekaied and just doing their best to blend in and somehow ended up a magic user?#Are they a secret third thing or a guide au iteration?#Who knows! (the author does but is too sleep deprived to elaborate)#All they know is that they're have feelings (up to interpretation) for Link and are close to Zelda#that Shadow may have stolen their dragon but they don't want to let him suffer alone now that Vio is gone even though they could have left#and that they would fistfight Vaati if not for their magical restrictions (it will be expanded in it's own one shot)#not necessarily in that order#yes I am adding to Shadow's extensive crimes and making it so that the dragon in the manga in this was Reader's.#They just wanted their scaly puppy back and now they're trapped in the drama and absolutely over it#linked universe x reader#they commiserate with Dot/Zelda over this fact over tea which can probably be an one shot of it's own
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"The outer reaches of space remain unexplored by humankind to this day, but its greed is relentless. We grasp and yearn and hunger for knowledge— answers to questions we cry out into the endless void expecting to understand, expecting the stars to respond. The stars will not, but one day something else will— and we will not like what it has to say." — Rome Solomon, Beyond the Exosphere (1965)
taglist (opt in/out): @shellibisshe, @florbelles, @ncytiri, @hibernationsuit, @stars-of-the-heart, @vvanessaives, @katsigian, @radioactiveshitstorm, @estevnys, @adelaidedrubman, @celticwoman, @rindemption, @carlosoliveiraa, @noirapocalypto, @dickytwister, @killerspinal, @euryalex, @ri-a-rose, @velocitic, @thedeadthree
#obscura#edit:rome#nuclearocs#nuclearedits#ok so. ok hi. red and i made a new universe hi. sorry. morris quincy victor and eleanor belong to them the rest belong to meee :3#the pictures i used are basically the patron saints of their occupation / line of work! so that's not what they look like#anyway it's a mix of paranormal stuff + lovecraftian horror + sort of zombies :^)#they're like. the domains of lucifer (demons) behemoth (zombies) and leviathan (the eldritch horrors that happen in space and oceans)#who are like. the three evils that torment the mortal realm#it's all in a historical setting kind of parallel to our world? so a bunch of historic events are the same but it's like#a little bit more advanced with technology but at the same time it's not. it's Just A Little Different y'know#rome's sister went to space for a mission and just straight up went missing which prompts him to become an astronomer#and he's the first one to start speculating the existence of leviathan as eldritch god#morris is a technician at the academy who has an angel stuck in his computer#eve is a nun and herbalist who witnesses the influence of behemoth firsthand through some sick travelers#that she and the other nuns of her convent take care of#anatoly and quincy are both from different space missions who end up as the only survivors who are not basically a plant#the other two survivors have secretly been replaced with some sort of parasites. annihilation style if you've seen that movie#eleanor is a demonologist and works together with her brother victor who's her cameraman#clarence is a blind psychic who lost her sight because of an angel trying to warn her and in return got her psychic abilities#and lazarus is one of the two most famous demonologists in the world but his wife (the other one) passed away#so now he's alone and since he's not from an upper class family like his wife was he's not all that loved as she was#there's a lot going on but it's SO fucking fun to work on so far. feel free to send any asks i would love to explain more :^)#if you've made it this far also hi i love you. kiss for you
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Does the clock in your sonas chest need oiling and calibrating. Do they carry WD40 with them like a human would sunscreen.
I think the clock would need a lot of upkeep considering this thing is jumping through interdimensional portals and is made of a HIGHLY corrosive.. Substance(?)
SO YEAH. As funny as that is, probably! It'd want to make sure the clock keeps working. Maybe it'd have a thicker layer of """skin""" near the clock as to keep it from the acidic stuff. Maybe, as part of the universe and something far beyond, it simply wills the clock into pristine condition
I think it'd enjoy the mundaneness of polishing it though. It'd make a bit out of the WD40 at some point
#zoc scrambled#zoc shack#SORRY I LIKE TALKING ABOUT CHARACTERS#but it also gets funky when it comes to me#my me. my Sona. because that one Sona is technically a branch of ten million other ones#all part of something higher#something akin to the universe#something so vast that you'd never be able to describe or fully encapsulate#but they all know this#deep down#I pinch small pieces of myself from the mass and I mold them like clay into something smaller#a vessel for which they can run free#every iteration of my Sona and myself exist#because they are all apart of something#something growing and unknowable#something human all the same#zoc asks
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community college is so funny because half of the teachers are like "For this class you need to use lockdown browser for all quizzes and tests. You need to buy this 70 dollar textbook, and all papers turned in must be in APA format with a title page even if they're only 500 words long. I will not accept late assignments. Also you have a minimum of 4 assignments a week." and the other half are like "you don't need proctoring for the final exam I trust you. here's a download link to a pirated copy of the textbook. as long as your writing is coherent and demonstrates an understanding of the material I literally could not care less what format you use. I can't figure out how canvas works so I'm not giving you due dates, just make sure it's turned in before the grading period ends. your only weekly assignment is a forum post with a minimum of 100 words."
#my favorite teacher so far is still the film history professor I had in my first semester.#he was very old and didn't understand how canvas worked at all and sometimes had trouble opening a video file#but simultaneously he was tech literate enough to recommend we use firefox with an ad blocker#because whenever someone missed class and was like 'where do i go to find the movie' he'd be like 'use an ad blocker and google it'#he said the school made him stop emailing links to free movie sites because people would open them on chrome with no ad block#and there'd be borderline malware on them. like this guy gave me the impression he was like. a veteran movie pirate lol.#that class had barely any assignments. like there wasn't a final exam or anything.#he just wanted us to write a paragraph or so answering a few questions about the movies we watched. it was chill.#and i also learned a lot actually. like i didn't know what a nickelodeon was before then. or the Hays Code.#the movies were genuinely good. i never thought Id be that into old black and white movies or westerns for example but they actually slapped#some of them had really mature themes and i definitely started to understand the people on this website who are like#'if the only media you consume is children's media you should maybe branch out instead of calling steven universe problematic'#because a lot of the movies we watched depicted very 'problematic' things and were able to directly address them because they are for adults#(to clarify I didn't just like kids media before then. i just mean that it introduced me to some older stuff i didn't think I'd like)#(but i ended up liking a lot. it also made me realize that movies made today are kind of shit. which i also already knew)#(but it put it more into perspective because I have more to compare it to)#im rambling now. community college is pretty swag i enjoy it. and i do get along with the teachers who have crazy requirements too lol.
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I’d need to watch it again to confirm this, but I’m pretty sure that Thomas Becket is the only character who independently initiates touch with Henry?
There are plenty of people whom Henry touches, and it’s almost always possessive or threatening: the villager woman in the first flashback scene, the Saxon peasant girl (and possibly the old man? I think he prods at both of them with his riding crop), Gwendolen (holding her shoulders/neck), the French prostitute (kissing, leaning over, sitting on, slapping her butt), his sons (pushing and kicking them), the bishop (strangling), his barons (clutching onto one, tapping one’s head to indicate his vapidness), and Thomas too—(clasping his shoulders when he realizes Thomas is hurt, holding his hand to put on the chancellor ring).
Interestingly, I don’t think we ever see Henry touch or be touched by his mother or his wife. There’s the moment when he grabs/kicks their needlework, and later on he knocks all the plates off the table, possibly vaguely in their direction—so there are two physical interactions which are violent but still sort of… distant? And still the direction is just Henry to them (in terms of physicality, anyway—verbally, they do initiate conversations/fights with him).
Does anyone touch Henry? There are the monks who whip him in the end, but Henry has ordered them to do it. Likewise, there’s the servant/valet/page who begins to wipe him dry in the bath scene, but again, that’s someone performing a duty. Thomas Becket though, cuts in and takes over the drying, and the dialogue tells us explicitly that he’s not expected to do this, and doesn’t have to (“You’re a nobleman—why do you play at being my valet?”) but Becket seemingly wants to do it, and he knows Henry likes how he does it: enthusiastically, confidently, warmly, and freely (“No one does it like you, Thomas”). He towels Henry’s head, helps Henry put on his boots, and then casually uses Henry’s legs to push himself up to stand.
There’s the scene in Henry’s tent, after the French prostitute has left and the two of them are sitting on the bed: Becket sort of leans in and briefly clasps Henry’s arm where it’s lying in his lap, casually and warmly.
There’s also the getaway horse ride, where Becket is holding onto Henry, arms wrapped around him, and they’re both laughing and smiling. Henry’s shirt actually falls open a little and Becket’s hand winds up on his bare torso.
And then there are the thwarted attempts at touch, after the split: the two scenes where Henry accuses Becket of not loving him. Both times, Becket moves toward Henry and reaches out to touch him, and both times, Henry moves away and tells him to keep his distance.
They’re quick little things, but if they are actually the only instances of anyone touching Henry affectionately (or even of their own volition) that we see over the course of the movie, it does support an impression of Henry as fundamentally isolated—maybe there is truth to his claim that Becket is the only person who’s ever loved him.
What’s tragic is that 1) Henry doesn’t really know how to express love himself (see: Henry expressing nothing but violence and entitlement to everyone else around him, and even to Becket for the most part), and 2) Becket’s love, albeit huge in Henry’s world, is conflicted and unfulfilling—for both of them.
Becket might be the only person who’s dared to reach out to Henry and meet him on something close to a human level, and Henry loves him for it, but why does Becket do it? Part of it may just be an instinct of Becket’s to fulfill a need where he sees one, if he can, and if it benefits him. I think it’s so interesting that Henry seems obsessed with the question of whether Thomas really loves him, when it seems the truth might be that Thomas actually doesn’t know; maybe it’s an unanswerable, even nonsensical question to him. Like, what else could he do? I don’t know. “Insofar as I was capable of love, yes I did [love you].” But the fact that his last words, unwitnessed and private, are, “Poor Henry.” Fuck me up.
Ok, that last paragraph got away from me and now I can’t stop. Tempted to draw comparisons to “Beauty and the Beast” (this is a sad version where no magical transformation happens… unless you take a particular Catholic stance and consider that both of them maybe took real solace and meaning in Thomas being made a saint and that Henry maybe found real absolution through his penance).
I also want to compare all of this to “The Lion in Winter”, where it feels like, rather than a story about one lonely monster in a castle full of people he sees as objects, it’s a whole microcosm of traumatized and power-hungry people, reaching out for power and security and love and stabbing each other in the back, over and over. (Like, of course his mother and wife and kids have complex feelings for him—some of which involve love!) I think that depiction is better and less myopic, more true to life and probably a more accurate portrait of the historical figures involved (even when it comes to Henry and Becket—Becket was of that world too, after all), but I think I’ve rambled enough about all of this, so I’m going to end this post now. I’ll just say that there’s something nevertheless appealing about the boiled-down fairytale melodrama of “no one else ever loved me but you!”
#this entire post (tag ramble and all) was in my Drafts for like 3 months. it’s a lot of words that don’t say much but I’m setting it free ->#and now a new epiphany#henry is just the fucking phantom of the opera again isn’t he lmao#the original blorbo#(for me I mean)#which makes thomas christine and god… is raoul.. :/#maybe it’s a hot take to call becket a simple fairytale melodrama lol#it has its complexities… there’s… spirituality and politics#(although idk if the film is actually that interested in the matter of the separation of church vs state)#there’s the entire thing about oppressive hierarchal social structures and whether love is possible within such a structure#and if it’s not possible to escape and not possible to love in it then is love even a meaningful concept? is this becket’s issue?#in the dvd commentary peter otoole was so unconcerned with / unaware of a marxist and feminist reading of it that I was baffled#and had to realize that I was seeing that by default but that it’s not like. actually the default or Correct meaning#the co-commentator tries to go down that direction talking about Henry’s mistreatment of Becket and Gwendolen#and then he asks otoole if he thought that was reading into it too much and otoole is like ‘yes lol’ so .#his take seemed almost existentialist? like the tragedy of henry and thomas is that they are bound to different Roles in the world#and that they simply couldn’t be otherwise even though parts of them wanted it to be different#because they’ve chosen different paths different meaning to fulfill (but are aligned in a way by becket’s death/ascension)#and that is definitely a huge aspect of it#becket’s line: ‘we must do—absurdly—what we have been given to do’#hmm#anyway clearly I’m fucking insane now so#have this I guess . or don’t lol. goodnight#I’m giving myself a d+ for this tumblr.com paper#becket#peter o’toole as henry ii cinematic universe
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